Let's say you know want to start your revolution or do your best work, but you just don't know how to unlock your strengths?
You have no idea what they are or worse you do know and you've been ignoring them.
How do you solve a mystery that is often buried deep inside you?
How can you let go of the thoughts, patterns and myths of what you've been telling yourself are your strengths (but really aren't) for your entire life?
Take me for example. I get bratty sometimes a lot. I don’t like to admit when I’m wrong. I hate working on something that I’m not good at, but I usually suffer through it until someone asks me point blank if it’s the best use of my time. I can even reject a a clear and OBVIOUS strength or talent even when it’s staring me straight in the face. (I beg you to tell me if you see me doing this…I'm not kidding you).
Do you ever feel like you’re fighting against some current — one you can’t see or seem to turn yourself away from?
You stick with jobs that don’t quite fit, where you feel like you shouldn’t complain, but inside you just aren’t happy. You do the same with relationships…with friends, maybe even your spouse.
I know what it’s like. You wear those slightly tighter than they need to be jeans to prove you are skinny enough to fit in them. And you do it everywhere you can in your life.
I’m going to share something that’s taken me a long time to realize and/or admit…and even knowing this, I STILL STRUGGLE with it.
When I try to fit into the job, the pants, the relationship, the style, the expectations, it NEVER WORKS. Why? Because it’s not me.
Fitting in Hurts. Bad.
No matter how hard I try, I just can’t bear the weight of it for long.
If you’re anything like me, then it’s tough to know when you find that right fit. You’ve been moving against the current, against what’s natural for your so long–maybe even your whole life.
Maybe you forgot what it feels like for something to fit RIGHT or feel great.
Been there?
Well, an odd thing happened and my memory got jogged a bit. It happened when I was reading a book called Now, Discover Your Strengths … one that I had resisted reading, but finally said, oh why not (insert bratty voice again). Suddenly, I remembered exactly what good felt like, what I loved doing. It was amazing! Instant clarity. The world around me felt sharpened.
But then dread…. why?
Now I could feel all those bits that weren’t quite right in my life. The spots I’d let live and grow and become big parts of my life. I was tangled all up in them. What to do now…now that I know they don’t fit. Dammit. I think I was happier not remembering. Why did I pick up that book?
After I stopped blaming the book for some pretty amazing realizations…excitement settled in. I got giddy thinking about how those things that come most naturally to me … wow, they were my strengths!
Over time, I became dedicated to using my core talents and strengths whenever I could! Now, if something doesn’t feel right, I do not slog through it. I stop myself and feel it out.
Here's exactly what I do and advise you remember today about fitting into your own life … my hope is that they will encourage you to discover your own strengths (and then give you the courage to use them!)
- If something doesn’t fit, find a gentle way NO to yourself–often the hardest person to talk to and convince.
- Look for small ways and places in your life to use your gifts right away–even if you aren’t being paid for them.
- What would you do if you could wake up tomorrow and immediately be using your strengths without excuses to anyone about why “you’ve changed”?
Why Knowing Your Strengths Is Important
The more you use your strengths, the stronger you will get. You’ll stop doing more of those activities that aren’t on your genius list and fill more of your time doing what you were meant to do!
Now, I know people say life is sometimes doing things you don’t want to do, but I always say, well, why can’t I just do what I’m best at and enjoy? Wouldn’t that make better sense and benefit everyone involved?
What do you say?
Do you have a sneaking suspicion you have a strength you’ve been avoiding or simply not using? Even if you aren’t sure where to start…I bet there’s 1 thing you can do right now that would be 100% aligned with your best but most hidden talent.
Leave a comment below today and let me know how you’re going to reveal your gift to the world today. Share this post by clicking Like or Tweet above!
OMG Anne!!! I feel like you are talking about me! What a fabulous fabulous blog…. Thanks for sharing!
Hey Anne,
This reminds me of something I read that has always stuck with me. It goes something like this:
Just because you’re good at it, doesn’t mean you’re happy doing it. And it doesn’t mean you have to do it. It’s better to do something that you’re happy doing, even if you aren’t the best at it.
I’ve resisted taking those strength finder tests, too! Sounds like it could be fun!
Yay! I love it! What strengths are you resisting LeeAnne?
I think the most eye opening thing was that I had been looking at my strengths as weaknesses… as soon as I embraced them and started take action, things got way easier in some many unexpected ways!
Check out the Strengthsfinder 2.0 book because it actually shows you how to take action a little bit more than the first.
love this post. it’s super important i find to live a fulfilling life and perhaps a longer one.
Hey there Anne,
I believe too many people don’t realize their strengths and when they do, for some strange reason, they avoid them.
It might be ego involved or something else that’s blocking sane thoughts. You touched on a great thing that people should really pay attention to.
Our strengths, or talents, are what make us who we are. Every person has a set of strengths that differ from others in some small way.
Embrace them, don’t avoid them. Only then can you begin swimming with the current instead of against it.
Great post Anne.
~Jeremy
What an insightful post, Anna. Wow! I totally relate to getting all ‘tangled’ up in the stuff that you don’t like. That is exactly how it feels.
It really is all about ‘the feeling’ we get. When we utilize our strengths, we radiate joy and everything falls into place. Love your take on this.
Ahem. Have you noticed my website is still “under destruction?” And that I STILL haven’t read that freakin’ book?
Resisting my strengths is my number one strength.
OKAY (she says in a bratty voice)…I’ll walk two blocks to Barnes and Noble and buy it right now.
Thanks for the nudge 🙂
Melody, great observation!
I’m good at a lot of things. I’m not bragging or being egotistical. One of my strengths is learning new things, so when I try something, if I am interested and want to learn it, I usually do. Singing is the one exception 😉
I spend a lot of time explaining that just because I’m GOOD at something doesn’t mean I want to make my LIVING doing it. It’s just fun to do it sometimes!
Hahah… Sukie! When are we getting together for coffee or tea? I have the same problem…I was resisting my strengths for a long time… then when I realized what I was doing, I stomped over to them and said, “FINE!” and just gave in. 🙂
Anne
I hear you Jeremy on avoiding your strengths. Totallllyyyy what I did for many years. And I probably will again, but my awareness and continuous pursuit to be in alignment with them keeps me grounded. I don’t stomp around too much anymore. I like it when I’m working, living, enjoying life AND using my talents all at once. It’s sooo much easier too really….
Thanks it helped alot 🙂